Day 2 LockDown

28 March 2020

1170 cases
Recovered: 5
Deceased: 1(Western Cape)

Today started a bit darkly for me. I woke up well ahead of my usual time, and couldn’t see the point of getting up. Day 2, with the number two perfectly representative of how I feel.

Probably the best way to describe my general state of mind is ambivalence. These are challenging times, more so because our expenses are not stopping and we have so many people dependent on us. I am not sure how I feel about any of this. I oscillate between an optimistic and cheery: We’ve got this! to a very dark and pessimistic: We’re going to go under, lose everything and die.

It is hard to not follow the news, because I need to know what is going on so that I can make the correct decisions for my business and assist our clients. For instance yesterday government issued a gazette that boils down to every website with a domain name that ends in .za – from government portals to private blogs – must now link to the government’s main Covid-19 page on its front page. No indication on when compliance deadline is, just get it done.

Online is a bad place to be right now. There are articles about thousands of people in various areas of our country not complying. People are happily cycling, jogging, travelling, visiting, going to the beach… as if this is business as usual. Our armed forces and the police have their hands full to get people to just do the one simple thing asked of us: stay home. On the other hand there are photos and footage of streets in major cities without a single car or person in sight.

This morning I woke up to three pieces of very bad news: EdCon may have to close its doors after lockdown (Edgars, etc – all those people, without jobs), Moody’s downgraded our status as a country to junk, and our connectivity is an issue again. We have so many challenges are business owners right now, just to stay alive and kicking. It breaks my heart that so many of us are doing what we are supposed to be doing: staying put. Our businesses are hanging on by threads and we do what we can. We all want lockdown to be over and as many people as possible to be safe. Yet the sheer arrogance of a sector of our population is going to worsen everything before it gets better, and lockdown may very well be extended.

At home, my toddler twins are climbing out the walls. They’ve not known so many days indoors in their entire little lives. I’ve always made a point of outdoor activities, and spoils and picnics and roadtrips. They want to see their friends. My daughter wants to do ballet, it is all she’s been talking about for two days now. My son wants to play soccer and go cycle. After they decided to vandalise the neighbours backyard yesterday, I am reluctant to let them outside without supervision, and I have to work most of the day, so their outdoor time is shrinking. What memories will they live with because of these times?

The new norm is to wake up in the morning, kick my own behind just to get started. Sort out the twins, get to my desk, get my work done. Stay positive. Freak out on my own, so nobody sees it. Calm down our housekeeper, who moved in with us because she felt unsafe in Thembalethu, and frankly, because it is the right thing to do. Cook/bake something from scratch for our little household. Make/craft something with the twins. Check our provisions, order the necessary online. Put on mask, gloves, sanitise card machine, pay. Come back inside, wipe down groceries, pack away. Try not to incessantly stress eat all. the. time. We are going to be fine.